Saturday 11 September 2010
Who am I ?
Today I realised that I am not confused about the person I am, want to be and can be, but I actually don't know who I am. Yesterday I was this sad girl , who wanted to be glamorous and couldn't get over her boyfriend, today I am the girl who wants to go to Thailand, live a boho life as vegetarian and have a hippie attitude towards relationships. She would love anyone that gives her love and let them go because we all need to be free. There are so many more girls that sometimes appear. Such as the angry girl, the misterious girl and the ugly girl. I do like boho girl the most though. She's happy. She knows what she wants to do with her life. She has ideas and wants to see them work. It may not seem so terrible to have such different personalities everyday but it confuses me greatly. I change my mind and my attitude completely when I become one of the girls. I woke up this morning with this will to live a different type of life. I started making plans and got so carried away I forgot what I felt yesterday. Then suddenly it came to me. What if tomorrow I stop wanting these things anymore? What happens then? I don't know the anwers to these questions and honestly the uncertainty is confuses me the most. I don't know who "me" is and in reality I can't be "myself".
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